Just one of those days....

.... where I feel down and the loss of my little boy really HITS me. A day where little things bother me alot more than they normally would and I just feel an overall feeling of sadness and tiredness. Most days I blog about all the fun things that are going on in our lives but underneath it all I am always reminded of what is missing. Our perfect little boy. I know that we are SOOOOO blessed with so many things in our lives but that doesn't take away the hurt of never knowing what my little boy's laugh sounds like, never getting to sit with him in the evenings and get him ready for bed, tuck him in each night and whisper to him, "I love you" before going to sleep. My precious Tyler, I love you so much and I miss you more than anyone will ever know.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane,
I would walk right up to Heaven to bring you home today.

No farewell words were spoken, no time to say goodbye,
You were gone before I knew it, and only God knows why.

My heart still aches in sadness and secret tears still flow,
What it meant to lose you, no one will ever know.

Weekends are tooooo fast!!!!

This past weekend seemed to just fly by! On Saturday I went to some garage sales and then afterwards we took Maddy and Charlie to the local Butterfly Festival. It was neat, they had little crafts and kids area's set up, a few animals and then we had packed a picnic lunch to have. It was nice but not real impressive it was really crowded and WHEW! the Florida weather is picking up because it was starting to get HOT!
Then that evening we went to Hanna Park to meet Matt's parents for the evening. They have a camper and love to go there to camp out. So we met them for dinner and cooked out
some hot dogs and the girls enjoyed playing together we brought 2 babies and 2 baby strollers and this provided endless amusement for them! Then they went in the camper and giggled nonstop as Papu (that's what Maddy calls Matt's Dad) snuck up and scared them! It was so cute!

Matt got Maddy her very first fishing pole. It is sooo cute and little and PINK!!! They tried it out by trying a pretend food hot dog to the end of it and casting it and then reeling it in! Maddy thought this was sooo funny and loved it!

Friday I took Maddy to storytime at the Downtown Library. The story time here is the best! It's called, "Toddler Power-Hour" they have 30 minutes of storytime and then 30 minutes doing a craft. And the story and craft always go together as a theme. Today's theme was ,"In the Garden" We read books, sand songs, and did fingerplays about gardens and then in craft time they made their own garden critter it could be anything they wanted. Maddy made a worm!

Painting on the art easel at home in the playroom!

Earth Day!

So this past weekend Jeanna and I packed the kids up and headed out to an Earth Day Celebration in Palm Coast. It's not too far only about an hour away but it felt like a mini-vacation if only for a day! *Sigh* Maddy and Charlie enjoyed watching Maddy's Princess Sing-Along DVD on the way down there and Charlie let Maddy play with his ears. I know, I know, strange right? I don't know why but Maddy has a thing with ears. When she is tired she likes to play with my ears and it soothes her. I must admit I love it, I think it's so cute!

When we got there we were surprised by the TONS of kid's activities they had! It really made me think about recycling more! The first thing they did was painting. They had a huge wooden mural and then paint and paintbrushes and thankfully smocks too! The smock was a little big on Maddy but as you can tell she didn't mind one bit! She LOVES to paint so her and Charlie painted away!

They also had paint your own birdhouses and you got to take them home with you!!! I was really impressed by this! (Which reminds me I need to go get some bird food and hang that thing!)

Next was the obstacle course and I think that this one was both Maddy and Charlie's favorite thing there! They wanted to go through it again, and again, and AGAIN!!!

Next we went to the flower planing booth and Charlie and Mad's both learned how to plant their own flower to take home....

A recycling center where you had to take items out of the recycling bin and sort them by plastic, paper, etc. Maddy didn't really get this but she had a blast running back and forth and putting things in the buckets!

We also went down by the river and saw a jellyfish!

We did probably about 5 other activities, sand search for shells, bean bag toss, make earth's with coffee filters and water paint, painted shells with our initials, etc. Then while we waited for our stuff to try we went to all the adult booths were people were selling items such as handmade soap and woven clothes. We got some lunch they had local places with booths there selling food and had the most DELICIOUS BBQ sandwiches and hot dogs for the kids while watching the live entertainment.

Next we went over to the beach, it was so cool there beach there is lined with huge coquina rock/shell formations and when the waves come in they flow over the rocks leaving little tidal pools. Maddy and Charlie loved the beach. Although the water was COLD!!!!!!! We stayed for a little while playing in the water and sand and then headed back home. It was a great day and we decided we will definitely go back for the Earth Day festival again next year!

Updates!

Maddy went for her speech/language evaluation at Wolfson's and qualified for speech once a week! They said that it isn't anything severe it's very mild which is why they are saying only once a week. Our first appointment is next Wednesday! On the other hand Maddy has been talking alot more lately! Just today she told me, "I want to draw!" Oh how I love seeing her little personality come out! Random pics!

Afternoon at the Cummer Art Museum

Right before Spring Break I went with my friend Kelli to do a fun "photo shoot" with Maddy at the gardens at a local museum. Then we let Maddy play in the kiddie area.

We went out of town to Helen, GA for Spring Break for a week and had a great time!!!! I know this is kinda lazy of me but I took TONS of pictures while on vacation and considering you can only load 5 pics at a time to blogger it would take me 5 years to post them all so here's the links to the albums from out trip that I posted on facebook!

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2052943&id=1510974000&l=ce462f3d38

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2053134&id=1510974000&l=755b1dad0b

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2053171&id=1510974000&l=cd3eac78e2

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2053302&id=1510974000&l=8d68b51824

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2053447&id=1510974000&l=49ae9a3b72

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2053484&id=1510974000&l=4ed0c965f3

Ahhhh... time to go to bed! Night!

I love this! This was made by another mother who lost her child. I think it is just beautiful!
www.namesbycandlelight.blogspot.com

Bye bye bottle...

Afternoon at a local parl, Castaway Island Preserve. We had a great time walking the nature trails with Maddy and her cousin Emma and then walking down to the dock to throw rocks in the water.

So I am kinda sad to say that we got Maddy off of the bottle this week. : ( She was still taking bottles before nap and bedtime with milk and we had been putting it off mainly because I was afraid that if we took it away she wouldn't drink milk anymore but..... we switched to the sippy cup and at first she still said, "baba...baba.." a few times but I just told her, "No, here is your baba now it has your milk in it." And she took it! Yay!!!

AND...... DUN-DUN-DUN....... Maddy went pee-pee in the potty for the first time this week!!!!!!!!!!! We were so proud of her! Since we got her new princess potty we have been encouraging her to sit on it and try to go pee-pee in the potty usually each night before bedtime when she goes in the bathroom she will say, "pee-pee" and point to her potty then sit on it for a minute before getting in the bath but she would never actually go she would get up and we would tell her good try! But the other night she walked in like normal said, "Pee-pee" walked over to her potty sat down and peed!!!! I yelled, "Matt, come here Maddy's going pee-pee in the potty!!!!" He ran in and we were like yay Maddy!!!!!! She was kinda looking down like oh, there is something coming out of there! It was so funny and cute! Afterwards we gave her some M&M's since she went on the potty! So far she hasn't gone again but is still sitting on it each day at least once and trying so that's all I expect for now!

She has also been talking quite a bit more. It seems everyday she is saying a new word but it's usually after we say a word she will repeat it but still it's progress! Now as soon as we get out of the car she says, "I walk!" She is becoming so independant about things and wants to walk. She will also say, "I no want to" when she is being stubborn! Only about a week and a half until her appointment for speech evaluation with Wolfson's.